Are Your Jokes Rude? Are You Having Fun Or Hurting Others?

Jokes for some people involve put downs and insults in the name of teasing and joking. A favored sports season seems to bring this out in many people. The jokes often get more involved and meaner as the season or game progresses. The two parties or people each trying to one up each other and say "it's all in fun" to anyone who disagrees.

Where do you draw the line?

At first it is just the people who are bantering who hear the comments. Then more people are subjected to the increasingly offensive humor. First the people nearby, then people in the room, then people outside as well, especially in this age of social media. One or both parties take the comments online, flashing people's wall. Then the comments get louder and louder in public and ruder and ruder online and offline.

Is it rude to others?

Soon someone will step in asking to keep it down or that the comments are getting too crude. The answer is quick "We are just playing" or "Stop being so sensitive." While you may think that person is being sensitive there are probably quite a few more that have not said anything. Some people hate to be rude, even if you are.

Is it a joke?

When you tell a joke or joke with someone they may not agree. While people do have different senses of humor there are other factors that may be involved. Some jokes may be funny in a different place or at a different time. A joke about the drought is not funny to someone worried about it.

How was it said?

If you are saying something as a joke, without being mean then it may be a joke. If the comment is said as an insult, to be rude or hurtful jokes then it will be perceived as such by someone. If you want to laugh with someone rather than at, then any joke that includes "I am just joking" should be avoided.

Is the other party laughing?

No matter how you said it or with what intent, if the other person or party is not laughing then it was not a joke. If the other person is not laughing the "joking" needs to end. If the person becomes upset, angry or hurt, it is time to apologize. Do not make excuses or give reasons why or how it was a joke. Above all do not make a joke about not being able to take a joke. Apologize and mean it. If you can not mean the apology then agree to stop and mean it.

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